


Pick a star on the dark horizon and follow the light

by Kroolea



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, The Mandalorian (TV)
Genre: Angst, Bittersweet Ending, Character Death, Grief/Mourning, Jon Favreau is gonna catch these hand, SO MUCH ANGST IM SORRY, Self-Reflection
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-18
Updated: 2020-12-18
Packaged: 2021-03-11 02:27:45
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 642
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28157550
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kroolea/pseuds/Kroolea
Summary: {{MAJOR SPOILERS FOR CHAPTER 16}}He takes off his helmet and stares at it. He can see his distorted face it it.The tears from earlier never really stopped. They slowed, but never ended.-----Din reflects on grief in his life.
Relationships: Din Djarin & Grogu | Baby Yoda
Comments: 4
Kudos: 93





	Pick a star on the dark horizon and follow the light

**Author's Note:**

> Crying in the club rn wow get ur tissues folks
> 
> Title is taken from The Call by Regina Spektor and I feel like it has the vibes of that season finale

Din locks himself away in the fresher once joins Bo-Katan and Koska. His body aches all over from the events.

He takes off his helmet and stares at it. He can see his distorted face it it.

The tears from earlier never really stopped. They slowed, but never ended.

A tear splashes onto his face in the reflection.

Din tried very hard to not get attached to people. Attachments cause people to make rash decisions. In his own case, they make people go back on their beliefs.

And losing people you're attached to...

It _hurts._ It hurts so kriffing much.

His first encounter with loss is his grandmother, she was always a frail woman. Din barely remembers sitting at her funeral, bored but watching his father speak. He remembers being sad that she wouldn't be able to make him cookies for Life Day or watch him after school. He didn't know it was grief, he just knew he was upset.

Five years later, it was his parents. He remembers the way tears ran down his mother's face as she kissed him goodbye. He remembers the way his father helped him into that dark, cold cellar. His parents were never apart, even in death. But Din remembers before that terror-filled moment, he remembers the hugs and cuddles, the bedtime stories. He remembers the lullabies his mother hummed and the jokes his father told.

He still misses them sometimes.

He was 19 when he lost his _buir._ She raised him through the hardest part of his life. She was there for him when he cried and when he missed his parents. If he's being completely honest, she was more of his mother than his actual mother.

She taught him how to properly grieve.

" _Nu kyr'adyc, shi taab'echaaj'la_. But it's okay to miss them, Din." She would tell him. Her dark eyes understanding.

Without her, Din would have died so it wasn't surprising that her death rocked his world. She wasn't killed in a battle or from old age, Din never expected her death.

He had left for a month on a trip and when he returned, she was gone. They told him she was sick for a long time, but hid it from him so he didn't worry. That began his need to detach himself from everyone, he didn't talk much to anyone. He took up bounty hunting.

He had lost others in that amount of time, and every one of those losses stung, Paz, Kuiil, kriff, even IG-11's death stung a bit.

But this, this is worse.

With the other deaths in his life, he had no say in the other deaths, they had happened and he was left to pick up the pieces.

He has to chose to face this loss though. He has to let Grogu go, to live without him. To learn what Din could never teach him.

And it's _so much worst_. It hurts more, it breaks his heart.

Din doesn't want to. He was being selfish, he knows, but he doesn't want to let the only light in his world go. The only one he has left to live for.

No, that's not right. He has Cara, and Greef, and everyone he had met that he hoped to cross paths with again. Omera and Winta, Cobb, Peli.

So, Din lets Grogu go.

"You're going to do great things, kiddo." He murmurs before setting the kid down. Grogu coos as he toddles toward the blue astromech.

In his mind, he makes a promise to keep living for everyone. This wasn't the end.

This was the beginning of a glorious story he can write himself. One where he can help people, restore Mandalore with Bo-Katan, he's better than he was and he can use that to his advantage.

Din Djarin closes one door, reluctantly, and swings open the next one.

**Author's Note:**

> Did I write this ending how you are supposed to write therapy journal entries? 
> 
> Yes.
> 
> Please come cry about this finale with me on Instagram @onceuponagalaxyfarfaraway


End file.
